Setting Limits

Limits are important in any relationship, because you need to make sure that you are not doing things you will regret later and that you have a plan to protect your heart and body from the risks of sexual activity. So what do you do? You need to think in advance about what you feel comfortable with, and what will keep you on track to achieve your relationship goals. It needs to be in advance, otherwise in the heat of the moment its going to be pretty hard to figure out what you really think (your hormones will get in the way!)

Figuring out your limits is a personal thing no one can decide them for you. But you will be influenced by lots of things like your parents, your friends, your values, and your spiritual beliefs. You need to choose your limits carefully because the further you go physically with someone, the harder it is to stop and say no to sex. Below are some things to consider that will help you decide your limits at this stage of your life. Its normal for limits to change as you get older, so come back to this page occasionally and reconsider your answers.

Limit list:

1 The furthest I am willing to go:
On a first date I will not go further than:
(example: hug, hold hands, short kiss)
2 I will go out with someone for (length of time)
before I (physical activity)
I will go out with someone for (longer length of time)
before I (further physical activity)
3 I am not comfortable with:
(degree of physical affection)
I am not comfortable with: (atmosphere) (example: being alone in the dark, being at his/her house with no parents, watching movies/TV with lots of sex)
4 It could be harder for me to maintain my limits if I am:
at a party with drugs/alcohol,
using drugs/alcohol,
my boy/girlfriend is using drugs/alcohol
It gets harder for me to maintain my limits if I am with my boy/girlfriend past am/pm (time)

Doin' It Right…

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